In this article, I am addressing Kanika’s queries on myths of masturbation, how it affects relationships and sex life.
Kanika: My friend seems to be addicted to masturbation. How do I know if I am addicted or if it is chronic? How much masturbation is good or bad?
- Do you feel distressed by doing it? If you think masturbation is causing any kind of discomfort or distress it is best to visit your doctor.
- If you feel some kind of pain during the act, it could mean you have hurt yourself accidentally, or you are not doing something right. Correct it!
- While there is no benchmark, stating one can masturbate ‘a particular’ number of times in a day or week. However, till the time, the act does not disrupt your life in any particular way, it is ok.
- If it is adversely impacting your relationships, stop it! Speak with a doctor and your partner (if he/she is understanding).
The Best Thing is to Talk it Out With Your Healthcare Professional
Kanika: My friend does not get the urge to masturbate. Is that normal?
Me: Of course! Everybody is made differently, and has different needs. It is fine if you have never masturbated and do not want to!
Kanika: Well that is good for her, but she also told me that masturbation causes blindness and a low libido? Im worried!
Me: Kanika, let me tell you some weird myths which float around masturbation. These are silly because there are no biological connections. I have explained in the earlier article, as to what happens when one masturbates.
Masturbation will NOT cause:
- Decreased libido, impotence or erectile dysfunction
- Penis shrinkage or curvature
- Hairy palms
- Low sperm count
- Mental illness
Kanika: Tell me, is it the same for women and men?
Me: Logically, yes! It is the stimulation of erogenous zones of the body. It is pleasurable for both and both can masturbate for their partners too!
However, a Few Might Experience
- Chafing or tender skin if they are too rough, but this will usually heal in a few days. In men, there might be a slight swelling of the penis, if done too frequently.
- At times, people feel guilt but like I said, it’s just the physical urge of the body combined with the fireworks of the brain. It’s just fun! Nothing to be ashamed about.
A Few Things to Keep in Mind
- Aggressive masturbation is unhealthy for men and women both. You might hurt yourself! In men, too tight a grip can result in decreased sensation for some time. This can be solved through change of technique. In women, it might lead to pain in the vagina, if the area is not lubricated, or rashes.
- It is a myth that people in relationships do not masturbate. It’s a common behaviour to masturbate for the partner as well and it is normal!
Kanika: Does masturbation affect sex?
Me: Yes it does. Like I said, many people observe an increase in urge with the partner. Also, it makes you aware about your own body. You can share with your partner what you like and don’t.
In fact you can tell him/her what makes you orgasm. However, if you feel masturbation is overtaking the role of sex with your partner, then I will be concerned! It is time to speak with your partner about what you like and don’t. Sex in a relationship is extremely essential.
Kanika, it is appreciated that you have asked these questions. It is best to clarify doubts than to be in doubt. I hope your doubts are cleared now. Tell your friends to read up and ask questions in the comment section below!