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Sexual Confidence: How To Find Yours?

sexual confidence

I wonder if there is any other topic than sex that is surrounded by so many complicated and mixed notions. It can be as simple as an erotic act and as complex as our deep-set desires and beliefs. In a world where sex is either served wrapped in toxic messages such as it is sinful and wrong, or packaged in dehumanizing portrayal in the form of porn, how does one build sexual confidence? How do you rid yourself of shame and become sexually liberated?

How Can You Build Sexual Confidence? 

There is no simple answer to these questions. Sexual confidence isn’t about being up for anything and increasing your ‘score’ of sexual partners. It’s about knowing yourself, your wants and desires, your boundaries and the ability to communicate them. Your sexual self-esteem cannot be built upon something that has been taught to you or fed to you by someone else. You need to figure it out on your own and here are a few tips to begin with the process:

  • Get to Know Yourself: Sounds simple, right? Only if it really was. Based on your experiences, list what you like and what you don’t about your sexuality. Then dig deeper – think about the reason for those likes and dislikes. Based on these, set your own boundaries, so you know when someone oversteps or when it’s time to open a dialogue.
  • Get To Know Your Body: Are you comfortable looking at your naked body in the mirror? Look at your body and internalize that the mainstream definition of sexy isn’t really true. You can’t be confident until you’re comfortable with your body. Exercise, keep your body fit and healthy and listen to it to understand it.
  • Fire Up Your Imagination: It’s difficult to be confident about sex when you are not sure what you like and dislike. Begin with yourself first. Read some erotica, watch something sexy, explore and pleasure yourself. Sexual confidence stems from the awareness that the key to your sexual power lies with you. This is crucial for women – before you hand over the responsibility of pleasing you to someone else, make sure you know how to do that yourself.
  • Discover Your Sexual Script: We are conditioned by our families, society, media and friends about sex. Unlearn all of it and figure it out on your own. Let your experiences define your sexual script. If you are faced with sexual blockages or disturbed by certain experiences, reach out to someone you can talk to. Don’t let others define your story and take the control back.
  • Learn to Communicate: A 2017 study found that heterosexual women get fewer orgasms than everyone else. One of the primary reasons cited was that women aren’t vocal about their desires or pleasures. Women suffer from the cultural conditioning that instructs them to please and submit to a man’s desire. You have to take charge of changing that. Most of the men are misinformed about female desire and you need to take the control by explicitly stating if something is or isn’t working, or something you like and you want more. If you can’t articulate your needs, keep in mind that no-one else is going to do it for you.

All of us carry some amount of sexual shame. Slowly and gradually, with self-awareness and mindful sexual practices, we can unburden ourselves of this shame and find our sexual selves. Take it one step at a time and begin moving towards experiencing joy and connection in bed with sexual confidence.

We hope this article on Building Sexual Confidence helps you! Do leave your thoughts in the comments below. For more articles by our Sexual Wellness Expert Pallavi Barnwal, check out Healthy Reads or tune in to her LIVE sessions on GOQii Play. You can also connect with her on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/pallavibarnwalcoach

#BeTheForce 

Disclaimer: Reader discretion is advised. This content is for an older, mature audience who seek to improve their health and wellness. GOQii is not responsible for any misrepresentation of this information.

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Sleep Series: The Chemistry of Sleep

sleep series: chemistry of sleepDifficult to believe? Yes it is true. The perfect sleep is the result of a complex reaction from 2 main chemicals. Adenosine is a neurochemical which accumulates during “wake” and drains during “sleep”. Imagine a specially made hourglass, but one which builds up for approx. 16 hours of our wake cycle and drains within 8 hours of our sleep cycle. The receptors of Adenosine inform the brain that “stock levels are up” and it is time to relax and sleep. As sleep kicks in, stock levels of Adenosine goes down and receptors send a “wake up” signal to the brain.

Adenosine is the primary inducer of sleep-wake cycle. It reduces neural activity and sets you to start sleep. Interestingly, Caffeine blocks the Adenosine receptors and creates the opposite effect.  There we go – as to why we feel a bit fresh and brisk after a cup of coffee – it is an illusion we create by confusing the brain! The body’s excretion system works hard to flush Caffeine. It takes 5-6 hours to flush out just 50% of this possessive chemical.

I’ve mentioned Adenosine over Melatonin as the primary sleep chemical because I wanted to impress upon the impact of Caffeine. We take Caffeine in many forms – Coffee, Cola, energy drinks, etc. Caffeine also impacts the Dopamine and Serotonin chemical reaction, thereby causing a significant disruption of the normal neural activity. 

Do let Adenosine do its job naturally, you will sleep on time and naturally! Caffeine interferes with several hormonal/neurochemical reactions related to sleep. Do not consume Caffeine beyond lunchtime and in any case, beyond 4pm. 

The Magical Darkness Hormone – Melatonin

Melatonin is the second chemical responsible for enabling “onset” of sleep. It detoxifies the body of free radicals and other toxins. It starts secretion as soon as darkness sets in and it peaks by midnight. The synthesis of melatonin occurs through a multistep complex chemical process:

  • It all starts with food – food contains an amino acid called tryptophan. Foods like Milk, oats, nuts contain more tryptophan. 
  • Tryptophan is absorbed from the bloodstream to the pineal gland in the brain.
  • First, tryptophan is converted to another amino acid and then to a brain chemical called Serotonin. 2 Enzymes are involved here!
  • Serotonin’s conversion to melatonin involves two more enzymes.
  • All chemicals discussed here follow complex routines and they are part of a chain which is amazingly responsible for the onset of sleep. On top of it all, there is a closely coordinated play of the “Brain-Gut complex” to get this right!

How Can You Aid This Natural Process For Good Sleep? 

DON’T intervene in the natural process! Supplements can’t get you anywhere near the good quality sleep offered by this natural process.  

  • Beware of Caffeine! – Stop post lunch consumption
  • Consume foods high in tryptophan – consult your GOQii coach
  • Gut (Serotonin storage) has its role in sleep, so keep it clean and healthy
  • Get used to darkness after dinner to catalyze natural Melatonin 

Adenosine has other functions such as certain cardiac functions as well. This article does not deal with them. An enzyme is a biological catalyst that speeds up the rate of a chemical reaction and an amino acid is an organic acid used to make proteins usually obtained from food. OTC Melatonin – a small dose is usually fine to get over jet lag. 

We hope this article on the Chemistry of Sleep helps you!  Stay tuned for more from the Sleep Series by Srini! To read more about sleep and sleeping techniques, check out Healthy Reads or tune in to LIVE sessions by experts on GOQii Play. 

#BeTheForce 

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Superfood Battle: Spirulina vs Moringa

Spirulina vs Moringa

Though moringa and spirulina are complete plant proteins as they contain all nine essential amino acids. Moringa has been showing up strong with other Super greens, like matcha, spinach, and kale. This time I would like to compare it with everyone’s favorite blue-green algae, spirulina. But before we get into the Spirulina vs Moringa debate, let’s understand what these two are. 

Spirulina is blue-green algae that grows on both fresh and saltwater. These tiny algae are packed with nutrients. In modern times, spirulina can provide many benefits. It is a rich source of protein and also a good source of beta-carotene, various minerals, and gamma-linolenic acid, an essential fatty acid. Spirulina is available in the form of capsules, tablets, and powder and can be incorporated in certain foods and beverages such as energy bars, popcorn, and smoothies.

Moringa Oleifera (drumstick tree) has been praised for its many health benefits for thousands of years. It is very rich in antioxidants and bioactive plant compounds which are good for health. So far, scientists have only investigated a few of the many reputed health benefits. It is known by many different names, such as drumstick tree, horseradish tree or ben oil tree.

Spirulina is a mighty protein beast, as it is high in protein as it actually holds the number one position on two points: highest protein content per calorie, and highest protein content per ounce. As 100 g of spirulina contains 58 g of protein. But you know we are not here just tell you how great spirulina is. For this battle, moringa will be depending on a few standbys: its high iron content, as well as its respectable amounts of vitamin A, calcium, and fiber. 

So, without wasting time let the Battle of the Greens begin!

Spirulina Vs Moringa

For this Spirulina vs Moringa debate, we will be comparing 10g (about 1 tablespoon) powder of each.

Spirulina  Moringa
Protein 5.75g 2.7g
Calcium 174mg 12mg
Iron 15.8mg 2.85mg
Fiber 3.3g 0.36g
Vitamin A 910iu 57iu
Potassium 140mg 136.3mg
Carbohydrate 5.1g 2.39g
Sodium 2mg 105mg
Calories 35 29
Vitamin C 0.99mg 1.01mg

Antioxidants Properties

Both Spirulina and Moringa are excellent sources of antioxidants. Each of them contains several different antioxidants, but spirulina falls just a little short when compared to moringa.

Moringa contains almost 40 known antioxidant compounds, whereas spirulina contains almost half of that. As moringa contains a great number of antioxidants in terms of the overall content, this round also goes to moringa.

Side-Effects

Moringa is considered to have no side effect, but the roots can be very poisonous. This is why one must keep in mind that only moringa fruit, leaves or seeds are meant for human consumption. Spirulina on the other hand has some potential side effects, although they are seemingly rare. The various side effects include stomach ache, constipation, dizziness – pretty much the usual suspects. According to the National Institute of Health, “People with autoimmune diseases – such as lupus, rheumatoid arthritis (RA), multiple sclerosis (MS),  and pemphigus vulgaris – might have to avoid spirulina because these blue-green algae may have immune-boosting properties, which in turn might worsen the symptoms of auto-immune diseases”. The NIH also points out that spirulina contains amino acid phenylalanine, which may worsen phenylketonuria, so people with this metabolic disorder should also avoid spirulina. 

We’ll call this round a wash given both super greens carry some risks, however minimal they may actually be.

Final Verdict: Who Wins?

Moringa knocks out spirulina 7-3 with several definitive points and wins. As it turns out, spirulina is kind of a one-trick pony as it just has high protein content, it really wasn’t very competitive in any of the other categories. Both moringa oleifera & spirulina, in the case of antioxidants, each contain several different antioxidants, but spirulina falls just a little short when compared to moringa. In case of side effects, both super greens carry some risks, but here as well, moringa hits the goal in case of autoimmune diseases. So if we take an overall review, I feel moringa wins! 

We hope this article on Spirulina vs Moringa helps you make healthier choices! Do let us know your thoughts in the comments below! For more on nutrition, check out Healthy Reads or tune in to LIVE sessions by experts on GOQii Play. 

#BeTheForce 

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Sleep Series: In Praise Of Darkness!

sleep series

In the beginning there was only darkness and then, light came out of darkness! Light and darkness are not two different and opposing things. Society has made a villain out of darkness. Darkness is used as a synonym of all things sinister. We are trained from childhood to look at darkness with fear.

In Hindu religion, darkness is deified – we have “Maha Kaal” and “Maha Kaali” – in religion this could either mean “darkness” or “time” – there is close relationship between them, but that is for another day. 

There is darkness everywhere – interstellar, intergalactic is just darkness.

Modern living has opted for lights of high luminescence. The poor old incandescent light of 60 watt (tungsten filament bulb) has a luminosity of 400-800 lumens whereas the modern day LED lamps can produce the same lumens at just 5 Watts. Where we had one incandescent light, now we have at least 4 LED! Which means we are consuming 5 times more light! 

Light has to be light ( Pun intended)

Since we fear darkness, we have created a social necessity (business necessity?) for bright light, whereas the number 1 villain for good sleep is LIGHT! Many of us know of the bad impact of blue light emitted from phones, laptops and tablets. Evenings are intended to be a journey to acclimatize to emerging darkness and night time is intended to be pitch-dark by nature.

So, for a good night’s sleep, the gradual reducing of lighting and luminosity is a must. Which means after 7:30pm, you should: 

  • Slowly switch off lights and send a signal of reducing light to the eyes
  • Make the bedroom pitch-dark for sleeping
  • Immediately activate “night mode” in Laptops and Phones

This could easily be the first step towards good sleep! Remember that you are meant to sleep in darkness. The sleep hormone Melatonin (more about this later) is highly impacted by luminosity. Darkness is key to sleep. Light is an inhibitor of sleep. Embrace the darkness, start falling in love with it! Darkness is the source of all light, time and space and is a good first step to a good sleep.

We hope you enjoyed reading this article so far. Stay tuned for more from the Sleep Series! To read more about sleep and sleeping techniques, check out Healthy Reads or tune in to LIVE sessions by experts on GOQii Play. 

#BeTheForce  

From Terminal Illness To Complete Wellness! Ananda Mukherjee Health Story

As we observe World Cancer Day under the powerful theme ‘United by Unique’ (2025-2027)**, we are reminded that every individual’s journey with cancer is distinct, yet united by shared resilience, hope, and the collective fight against this disease. This theme places people at the centre of care and their stories at the heart of the […]