GOQii

Blog

  • HOME
  • HEALTHY LIVING
  • FITNESS
  • HEALTHY RECIPES
  • USER STORIES
  • KARMA
  • BUY GOQii

August 29, 2018 By Divya Thampi 2 Comments

Empowering Ourselves Against Hopelessness – I

What makes life meaningful?

Divya blog image 1-part 1

News about a school child who just called it quits or a financially troubled couple who decided to give it all up or then a 70-year old who reached the dismal decision to end her life seems to be commonplace these days. It doesn’t surprise us anymore to know that yet another person has resorted to suicide. The ever-increasing number of deaths due to suicide is not just alarming and confounding but also calls for immediate action from individuals, families, organisations and societies at large because it is starting to look like we as a society has lost our moorings.

So what drives people to the brink of such hopelessness? Why do people conclude that only death can save them from their misery? The reasons expressed by the people, before they take this step, are hugely varied; from not scoring high enough marks to feeling like a misfit, to being overcome by a general sense of meaninglessness, the reasons are many. But is there something more fundamental we may be missing? Let’s delve a little deeper…

We know for sure that anyone who decides to end their lives has to be deeply unhappy. Instead of looking at all the reasons why a person may be unhappy, let’s start by looking at what makes people happy. Here, by using the term “happiness” I am not referring to momentary feelings of pleasure but to a sustained sense of well-being despite the challenges that life throws at you.

There are 3 significant contributors to our overall sense of wellbeing and to our feeling of engagement in life. In his book “Drive”, the well-known author Daniel Pink talks about three factors which have a significant impact on an individual’s intrinsic motivation. They are:

  1. Autonomy
  2. Purpose and
  3. Mastery

Divya-Image 2-Part 1

  1. Autonomy – This refers to the freedom to live life on one’s own terms. It is having the ability to make choices as per one’s will (Whether this choice is real or imagined is irrelevant). To understand “Autonomy” better, let’s look at some examples. Autonomy is about the freedom to make significant life choices like what job to take up, whom to marry, where to reside, where to invest one’s money, but it is not limited to these choices. Enjoying the liberty to take day to day and moment to moment decisions like what to wear, what to have for breakfast, whether to exercise or not, how to spend our leisure time etc., goes a long way in establishing our sense of autonomy. The need for autonomy is hardwired in humans and whenever we feel forced to do something against our will, we feel oppressed. This sense of coercion that makes us unhappy may be external or even internal. For instance, when we do things out of a sense of guilt, that feels like a lack of autonomy too and lack of autonomy is one of the most important factors leading to dissatisfaction and unhappiness. Life, of course, doesn’t allow us to live a completely autonomous life because each of us is part of a larger community and compromises are an integral part of community living. However, when we feel that we are largely in charge of our lives, it gives us a sense of satisfaction and happiness, while the lack of it leaves us feeling deeply dissatisfied.
  1. Purpose – When we have a purpose in life we have something to believe in and work towards, which is larger and more important than ourselves. Purpose drives us to persist even in the face of what may seem like an insurmountable challenge and keeps us grounded. When our sense of purpose is strong we often willingly surrender our autonomy and do things we do not enjoy, to progress towards that purpose. Parents may be willing to keep their preferences aside to help move towards their own purpose of helping their child have a better life or an actor may sacrifice opportunities to make money, so as to work towards her purpose of doing great work.

divya-image 3-part 1

  1. Mastery – Mastery is the desire to improve. When we work towards improving a skill through learning and practising, we are working towards mastery. Mastery again requires us to be committed, to overcome obstacles, to practice perseverance and consciously correct our course and practice a skill. For an athlete who is working towards becoming a better runner, her daily improvement gives her a higher sense of fulfilment that does the appreciation and recognition from others. Mastery in itself motivates people to do well and as the mastery in any area of one’s life goes up, it has a knock-on effect on the other parts of their lives and raises their self-esteem. It goes without saying that self-esteem is at the heart of a meaningful and well-lived life.

There’s a fourth aspect which is critical to our happiness, especially when we live as part of a community and that is the connection we have with others.

  1. Relationship with others – A 75 year-long Harvard study on Human happiness, that involved studying the lives of 724 men from the time they were in their early teens up until the time that they reached the ripe old age of 80s and 90s, threw up a very interesting statistic, with regards to happiness. The study established that the single most important factor when it comes to happiness and health is the relationships in our lives. The study found that people who were more socially connected to friends, family and community were happier, physically healthier and lived longer. So, it is not about how many friends you have or whether you are in a committed relationship but about the quality of the close relationships in your life.

As you can see, all these four factors namely Autonomy, Purpose, Mastery and Relationships are interconnected and each has a significant role in contributing to our overall sense of balance and well-being. The absence of any of these factors may foster feelings of oppression, aimlessness, disconnection or a sense of inadequacy or then a combination of all/some of these. These missing pieces leave people feeling like rudderless boats and drive one to take extreme steps to end the feeling of desolation.

(But there is hope and we talk about the steps we can take to live more meaningful lives in Part II of this blog.)

 

Search

Recent Posts

  • How Important Is Cardio For Weight Loss?
  • Breaking the Ramadan Fast with Healthy Bites
  • The Neurotransmitter Impacts Of Sharing Healthy Behavior On GOQii Arena
  • Keep Summer Cool With The Right Foods
  • Can You Workout On An Empty Stomach?

Stay Updated

Archives

  • March 2023 (31)
  • February 2023 (28)
  • January 2023 (31)
  • December 2022 (31)
  • November 2022 (30)
  • October 2022 (31)
  • September 2022 (30)
  • August 2022 (31)
  • July 2022 (30)
  • June 2022 (30)
  • May 2022 (30)
  • April 2022 (27)
  • March 2022 (27)
  • February 2022 (22)
  • January 2022 (23)
  • December 2021 (18)
  • November 2021 (17)
  • October 2021 (14)
  • September 2021 (12)
  • August 2021 (15)
  • July 2021 (17)
  • June 2021 (19)
  • May 2021 (17)
  • April 2021 (16)
  • March 2021 (16)
  • February 2021 (9)
  • January 2021 (10)
  • December 2020 (9)
  • November 2020 (5)
  • October 2020 (12)
  • September 2020 (9)
  • August 2020 (6)
  • July 2020 (3)
  • June 2020 (8)
  • May 2020 (12)
  • April 2020 (14)
  • March 2020 (13)
  • February 2020 (6)
  • January 2020 (5)
  • December 2019 (7)
  • November 2019 (9)
  • October 2019 (9)
  • September 2019 (6)
  • August 2019 (9)
  • July 2019 (12)
  • June 2019 (13)
  • May 2019 (9)
  • April 2019 (13)
  • March 2019 (13)
  • February 2019 (14)
  • January 2019 (19)
  • December 2018 (13)
  • November 2018 (9)
  • October 2018 (11)
  • September 2018 (11)
  • August 2018 (23)
  • July 2018 (13)
  • June 2018 (22)
  • May 2018 (16)
  • April 2018 (23)
  • March 2018 (17)
  • February 2018 (13)
  • January 2018 (18)
  • December 2017 (13)
  • November 2017 (25)
  • October 2017 (21)
  • September 2017 (20)
  • August 2017 (7)
  • July 2017 (11)
  • June 2017 (12)
  • May 2017 (14)
  • April 2017 (9)
  • March 2017 (6)
  • February 2017 (7)
  • January 2017 (11)
  • December 2016 (10)
  • November 2016 (8)
  • October 2016 (9)
  • September 2016 (7)
  • August 2016 (12)
  • July 2016 (10)
  • June 2016 (10)
  • May 2016 (12)
  • April 2016 (17)
  • March 2016 (18)
  • February 2016 (8)
  • January 2016 (6)
  • December 2015 (4)
  • November 2015 (9)
  • October 2015 (8)
  • September 2015 (10)
  • August 2015 (13)
  • July 2015 (10)
  • June 2015 (12)
  • May 2015 (9)
  • April 2015 (13)
  • March 2015 (9)
  • February 2015 (6)
  • January 2015 (12)
  • December 2014 (14)
  • November 2014 (11)
  • October 2014 (6)
  • September 2014 (14)
  • August 2014 (14)
  • July 2014 (7)
  • June 2014 (3)
  • May 2014 (8)
  • April 2014 (5)
Digvijay Singh

How Digvijay Singh Reversed Chronic BP Issues & Lost Weight With GOQii

Do you feel that no matter what you do, you’re unable to lose weight? You go for walks, meditate and even eat right but that scale doesn’t budge while lifestyle diseases plague you. Our Player Digvijay Singh was stuck in a similar predicament.  Life Before … [Read More...]

Ananda Mukherjee Health Story

From Terminal Illness To Complete Wellness! Ananda Mukherjee Health Story

We’ve always advocated that lifestyle diseases can be managed with a balanced, healthy and holistic lifestyle but can they also help you manage a terminal condition? Our Player Ananda Mukherjee, with help from his GOQii Coach, was able to battle such a condition. Here’s how his inspirational Health Story unfolded. Going From Slender To Overweight  […]

Rishikesh Ayre

The Right Guidance With Gradual Change – Rishikesh Ayre User Journey

Do you want to make a positive lifestyle change but don’t know how? Does it take every ounce of motivation for you to move? Do you need a nudge in the right direction? These are all valid questions and you’re not alone. Sometimes, we want to begin something new but don’t know where to start. […]

Venkatrao Alaparthi Loses 20kg With Guidance From His GOQii Coach

Venkatrao Alaparthi Loses 20kg With Guidance From His GOQii Coach

While earning a good livelihood is important, is it taking more life out of living? Long working hours, being seated most of the time with no physical activity and bad eating habits can take a toll on your health over a period of time. If this sounds relatable, you might have a lot in common […]

  • HOME
  • HEALTHY LIVING
  • FITNESS
  • HEALTHY RECIPES
  • USER STORIES
  • KARMA
  • BUY GOQii

Copyright ©2016 GOQii