GOQii

Blog

  • HOME
  • HEALTHY LIVING
  • FITNESS
  • HEALTHY RECIPES
  • USER STORIES
  • KARMA
  • BUY GOQii

February 5, 2021 By Pallavi Barnwal Leave a Comment

Mindful Sex Practices

Mindful Sex Practices

The fast-paced life has left most of us exhausted, stressed, and disconnected, and most of us attempt sex under these unfriendly conditions. Immediately after sex, most couples rush for their smartphones and sex timing is cut short to quick foreplay and ejaculation. It is difficult for our monkey minds to stay present and shut off all outside distractions. Such sex is unlikely to generate any intimacy, connection, and stronger orgasms. I have been through this nightmarish journey most of my life until I experienced a glimpse of divine lovemaking with a man. The synchronicity of our orgasms, the chants I sang as he thrust inside me, and the power I gained in my being as I rode on him with full confidence; all came from a deep work from within on my self and the man, that involved a blend of meditation, bodywork, and liberating conversations. Yes, this will take time but bedazzled by this experience, I am motivated to share some simple mindful sex practices that can begin the transformation of your intimate life with your partner. Run through the list, practice, and let me know your experience! 

Mindful Sex Practices 

  1. Embodied Movement: Most of us are so disconnected from our bodies; wearing tight clothes, spending most of our time sitting and unhealthy eating habits, all take us away from our bodies. It is important to drop in our own bodies and feel each cell, each pore of your being before you start to receive pleasure. This embodied movement brings you back to your home, your body. Start by standing tall, feet rooted, and taking a deep breath. Turn on music that matches your current mood and dance it out, feeling the motion move through your body. Then shift to music that matches how you want to feel and repeat.
  2. Relationship Agreements: There is a lot of unresolved, unspoken angst and resentment between couples which they bring out at the most unrelated occasions. Sometimes a seed of thought stokes an entire mental film where the person goes into unfounded imagination, a chain of destructive thoughts. All of this negatively impacts harmony in your relationship and eventually, sex takes a backseat. In order to avoid this, strive to form small relationship agreements that are doable, and can be discussed without hurting the ego of the other person. Choose 1-2 things you want to work on and set up a rule. Some examples: whenever one of you will talk about your inner feelings, the other person will not judge and will be compassionate; when you wake up in the early morning, give each other a nice hug; no phones at the dinner table (or in the bedroom), consciously give each other personal space. Express Gratitude. Sit, stand, or lie facing each other and holding hands or embracing. Take turns saying “I’m grateful for…” Continue until you both feel everything has been said.
  3. Eye Gazing: Keep eye contact with your partner during sex. You can be touching each other or in any sex position. Giggles and laughter are totally welcome. Try this daily for deeper connection and to shift out of your head and into the present moment.
  4. Connection with Heart Chakra: First, breathe into the center of your chest – your heart. If you are struggling to stay present, imagine breath and light going into your heart. These are shallower breaths so be mindful of doing this. Then connect your breasts with their chest – give their heart some physical love by massaging, cupping, pulling, and generally loving on their breasts.
  5. Sensate Focus: Use your monkey mind to notice all the sensual things happening. What are 5 things you see? Taste? Feel? Hear? Smell? Can you notice where exactly the hand of your partner is on your body as they are exploring you? What kind of sensation do you feel? This practice enhances our sensory experience and we are able to feel fully all the pleasure that is received by our body.
  6. Tantra Breath: Take a deep inhale and exhale with sound ‘ha’. Sounds create internal vibrations in our body and take the energy up from lower chakras to higher chakras. Something you can practice with a partner and take into sex. The sound should be deep but not high-pitched. As you get closer to orgasm, deepen your breath and breathe into your genitals. Any sounds you’re making will take you deeper into the higher realms of lovemaking experience.
  7. Chant As You Reach Orgasms: You can pick any mantra, (my favorite is om, omkar). Sex is this profound oneness, the union of masculine with the feminine, the arc of energy that travels from the masculine, emissive pole to the female, receiving pole. Through our chanting, we merge our personal consciousness momentarily with the infinite consciousness that is our origin and our destiny. It is the drop of water finding its way back into the ocean from which it came. Chanting raises your physical lovemaking experience to spiritual dimensions.

I have tried all of this and surely, this has transcended our physical pleasure to a spiritual, universal dimension. We feel as if the entire universe is in love with us and so do we. It is a divine experience, a symbol of indissoluble unity of pleasure and emptiness.

We hope this article on Mindful Sex Practices helps you! Do leave your thoughts in the comments below. For more articles by our Sexual Wellness Expert Pallavi Barnwal, check out Healthy Reads or tune in to her LIVE sessions on GOQii Play. You can also connect with her on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/pallavibarnwalcoach

#BeTheForce 

Disclaimer: Reader discretion is advised. This content is for an older, mature audience who seek to improve their health and wellness. GOQii is not responsible for any misrepresentation of this information.

January 22, 2021 By Pallavi Barnwal Leave a Comment

Is Your Relationship Abusive?

abusive relationship

Shweta Mishra, aged 21, met her ex-boyfriend at a friend’s party. They soon became close and started seeing each other. The guy had recently gotten out of one relationship and used to get very abusive at times. He would get drunk and talk about his ex-girlfriend which badly affected her self-esteem, to the point where she started considering herself ugly. He would also call her names and say that she was with him only because she wanted money. She started doubting her own attractiveness and self-worth slowly. His abusive behaviour did not end there. He would get jealous if she talked to any other guy and even forbid her to talk to the attractive ones.

He would try to touch her inappropriately when he was drunk which she detested. One day, it got much worse than the other days. He was badly drunk and started touching her inappropriately. She had started hating the smell of alcohol to the point that it made her nauseous. She said a repeated no but he went on groping her. That night she had the worst breakdown ever. The worst part was that he blamed her for being frigid and difficult the next day and told her that now she would make him the bad guy.

Shweta started having a series of breakdowns where she would hate herself. She started scratching herself as she felt ‘dirty’ and ‘ugly’. She would feel his face on her body and want to cut herself. Finally, she decided to walk out of the relationship to preserve herself. But even after months, she still has trust-issues in relationships. She had several episodes of breakdowns even after that when she hurt herself to ease the pain.

Does the above scenario sound familiar? Have you been mistaking an abusive relationship for ‘love’? If so, read on.

Love in young age is full of hormones, tumultuous changes, confusion and chaos. Adolescents and young adults often find themselves lost when it comes to finding out information on safe sex practices or healthy relationships. Popular media promotes eve-teasing, stalking, possessiveness and ownership behaviour as ‘love’. With increasing peer pressure to have a girlfriend or a boyfriend, a young mind which is already grappling with questions of self-worth is seduced with the idea of having someone as a partner. Most victims choose to continue being in abusive relationships just to avoid the shame of ‘breaking-up’. The communication gap between parents and children while growing up makes the situation even more difficult.

So how do you recognise these signs of abuse?

Emotional abuse or psychological abuse is categorized by a pattern of behaviour that leaves another person feeling isolated, degraded or worthless. It is a way for the abuser to maintain power and control in the relationship. Psychological pain can be just as bruising as a slap or punch, even if it leaves no physical mark. Let us talk about these in detail.

  • Intimidation: can be subtle and includes veiled or indirect threats. The partner could be watching each movement, checking on your whereabouts, checking your phone or springing up on you unexpectedly. This can have a damaging effect on a person’s overall sense of safety and lead to anxiety.
  • Explicit Threats: Sometimes, intimidation is not so subtle. We all know the infamous acid attacks on the victims who had the courage to say no to their spurned lovers. There are far too many instances of the partner threatening the girl with self-harm or suicide in case she leaves him.
  • Slut Shaming: This is another form of abuse which could leave the abused trapped, unwanted and ashamed. ‘If you don’t go out with me, I will tell everyone what we did in bed.’ Worse, the abuser could get explicit photos or videos of the abused and blackmail the partner into doing things they might not be ready for.
  • Name Calling: Abuser might call the partner ugly, fat, dark, stupid or similar such which eventually leads them to believe that it is true. The sense of self in teenage years is still fragile and such behaviour might lead to withdrawal and depression.
  • The Silent Treatment: Sometimes the abuser might use non-communication as a form of punishment to coerce the other partner. They might completely ignore the partner till they give in to their wishes. There are abusers who refuse to acknowledge the presence of their partners in public and are responsive when alone.
  • Constant Criticism: ‘You can’t wear that!’ or ‘You cannot hang out with those friends’ or ‘You cannot go there’ is something which abusers use to erode the self-esteem of the other person. This may make one feel unacceptable and feel bad about themselves.
  • Sexual Abuse: Any sexual contact or activity with an intimate partner that makes a person feel uncomfortable, with the purpose of controlling through fear, threats, coercion, manipulation or violence. This may be with or without the presence of physical violence at the time of the act or within the relationship. These happen mostly as there is lack of parental consent and the victims do not want to talk about it due to fear, guilt and shame. The victims could be both men and women, young adults who are in same-sex relationship, all ages – tween and upwards. Most such victims who were forced to have sex are less likely to use condoms. The perpetrator is frequently an intimate partner. Date rapes, forced oral sex, unwanted touching – all constitute part of sexual abuse.

If you have faced any of the above, it might be time to walk out of the relationship. This is not always easy but try talking to someone you trust – a friend, sibling or trustworthy adult. And always remember – IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT.

We hope this article helps you! Do leave your thoughts in the comments below. For more articles by our Sexual Wellness Expert Pallavi Barnwal, check out Healthy Reads or tune in to her LIVE sessions on GOQii Play. You can also connect with her on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/pallavibarnwalcoach

#BeTheForce 

Disclaimer: Reader discretion is advised. This content is for an older, mature audience who seek to improve their health and wellness. GOQii is not responsible for any misrepresentation of this information.

Search

Recent Posts

  • Sangeeta Jajodia goes from a Simple Housewife to a Super Woman!
  • 4 Effective Tips For Managing Couple Conflicts
  • Sleep Your Way to More Muscles
  • 5 Powerful Ways Of Meditation
  • Foods That Help You Boost Your Mood

Stay Updated

Archives

  • March 2021 (6)
  • February 2021 (24)
  • January 2021 (26)
  • December 2020 (27)
  • November 2020 (25)
  • October 2020 (27)
  • September 2020 (26)
  • August 2020 (26)
  • July 2020 (26)
  • June 2020 (27)
  • May 2020 (25)
  • April 2020 (25)
  • March 2020 (24)
  • February 2020 (21)
  • January 2020 (17)
  • December 2019 (21)
  • November 2019 (24)
  • October 2019 (25)
  • September 2019 (23)
  • August 2019 (18)
  • July 2019 (23)
  • June 2019 (22)
  • May 2019 (25)
  • April 2019 (23)
  • March 2019 (22)
  • February 2019 (21)
  • January 2019 (25)
  • December 2018 (16)
  • November 2018 (11)
  • October 2018 (12)
  • September 2018 (13)
  • August 2018 (23)
  • July 2018 (17)
  • June 2018 (23)
  • May 2018 (17)
  • April 2018 (28)
  • March 2018 (19)
  • February 2018 (14)
  • January 2018 (22)
  • December 2017 (16)
  • November 2017 (28)
  • October 2017 (22)
  • September 2017 (23)
  • August 2017 (10)
  • July 2017 (12)
  • June 2017 (13)
  • May 2017 (14)
  • April 2017 (9)
  • March 2017 (7)
  • February 2017 (7)
  • January 2017 (12)
  • December 2016 (10)
  • November 2016 (8)
  • October 2016 (9)
  • September 2016 (8)
  • August 2016 (13)
  • July 2016 (11)
  • June 2016 (10)
  • May 2016 (13)
  • April 2016 (18)
  • March 2016 (19)
  • February 2016 (8)
  • January 2016 (8)
  • December 2015 (6)
  • November 2015 (10)
  • October 2015 (8)
  • September 2015 (10)
  • August 2015 (14)
  • July 2015 (12)
  • June 2015 (15)
  • May 2015 (9)
  • April 2015 (13)
  • March 2015 (10)
  • February 2015 (6)
  • January 2015 (13)
  • December 2014 (14)
  • November 2014 (12)
  • October 2014 (6)
  • September 2014 (16)
  • August 2014 (14)
  • July 2014 (9)
  • June 2014 (3)
  • May 2014 (8)
  • April 2014 (5)
Sangeeta Jajodia

Sangeeta Jajodia goes from a Simple Housewife to a Super Woman!

They say being a housewife is a full time job, and quite rightly so. As one among many, 52 year old Sangeeta Jajodia from Mumbai, led a very busy life. Her routine revolved around tending to the needs and demands of her grown up children, cooking, cleaning and … [Read More...]

Shreejit Nandkumar

Shreejit Nandkumar Reaches His Health Goal With Determination and Consistency!

Losing weight or getting fit isn’t just about hitting the gym regularly or having a fitness regime. Pumping iron by itself cannot guarantee sustainable weight loss. It needs to be supplemented with a proper diet as well. One of our players, Shreejit Nandkumar, learned this little fact that changed his life forever.   A 47 year […]

Nikita Jain

Nikita Jain Battles A Rare Condition & Wins With The Right Coaching

The pandemic wasn’t easy on a lot of us. The entire lockdown, coupled with social distancing and movement restriction impacted a lot of people in different ways. A unique problem that one of our players Nikita Jain suffered from was Vocal Cord Dysfunction – a condition which was latent in her till the lockdown. Nikita […]

Mukul Bhartiya

Always Look At The Big Picture – Mukul Bhartiya User Journey

We often treat health as a one off objective but what happens once we achieve our goal? Do we fall back to our previous habits? While keeping health goals, it is important to always look at the big picture. While losing weight is a good target, being healthy should always be a lifelong goal! This […]

  • HOME
  • HEALTHY LIVING
  • FITNESS
  • HEALTHY RECIPES
  • USER STORIES
  • KARMA
  • BUY GOQii

Copyright ©2016 GOQii